Hi Friends!
My name is Pallavi. The reason i started writing this is to share my thoughts on some small but important family issues.
In past few years that i have been living in the USA, many of my friends have talked to me about issues with their families. Small things related to their husband, or big fights with their mother-in-law. There are mixed moments - most of it are good, but sometimes we do get into trouble with unwanted things. Why is that so? I was Just thinking, and that’s when i thoughts its a good idea to share what i think and how i would handle this issues.
No one’s perfect - Including me. So even i may suggest things that we should not be doing but then its just my thoughts..dont worry about it!
Also, most of the things i write about is based on a typical Indian family - joint or nuclear - but still Indian at heart so some of you may not be easily able to relate to it. If you have any questions, do let me know and i’ll try to answer them.
What’s the hope? Well, the hope is just that may be somewhere, someone who has these problems in life will be able to solve it and may be able to relate to some of these stories. I have seen them in every corner, with almost 70% of girls i know have one or the other issues in their family…other 30% are either not sharing or they are really lucky. IF you have a story to share, a problem or better yet a solution, please do share.
February 2nd, 2010 at 8:21 pm
Hello Pallavi,
Thanks for sharing the blog. Whatever ou have said is very much true with a middle class Indian family.
I can say I am very lucky my Saasu maa and Sasurji takes care of me very well. We don’t have any misunderstanding with each other. They are really very nice people. Sometimes I will be shouting on them because on my husband. As my husband is a short tempered. Actally me too. Because of this we be getting in to fights most of the time.
I am learning to control my temper now a days (2010 resolution). Actally I don;t want to get in to aruguments, flights, mood off and all those kinds of things in my life.
Can you help me someting to over come this.
Thanks,
Cheers
Ashwini
February 7th, 2010 at 3:17 am
Dear Ashwini,
Thanks for sharing your thoughts.
As you must know, well begun is half done. If you have taken this resolution to control your temper, then thats the first step.
To tell you the truth, i was short tempered too. And believe me, it can sometimes be really hurtful to others, and ourselves too.
Here are some steps you can use to control your temper:
1. As soon as you feel you are getting angry, change your state. I know it sounds easy, but its tough to do. You need to know right then, and change your state of “temper” to “calmness”.
2. Find the reason why you are getting angry. Is it your own perspective of what happens around you? or is it really the other person’s mistake? In both cases, solve the issue instead of keeping it inside. If its actually your own issue, try to not change/correct your perspective. If its the other person, let them know calmly, how you feel. Hopefully, they won’t do it again.
I can say that these are the ONLY 2 steps needed to get control over your anger. (1) Change your state (2) Find the reason for anger, and fix it…or atleast try to fix it.
Don’t keep things bottled inside you…
Wish you a happy married life! enjoy..
-Pallavi